Thursday, June 11, 2009

The Proximity Diet

Did you know that Colorado is the skinniest state in America, with an obesity rate of only 18.4%? You can see that because Colorado is green on the map, while the fat states are brown and orange, or if you're Mississippi, God forbid, red. Did you also know that Colorado has held this title since 1990? And hey, what's up all my fattie sisters in Mississippi?



Of course, when I first arrive in Colorado, everyone will be all, who's the new fat lady in the neighborhood? But then, just by being close to healthy people, I will automatically become skinnier and healthier.

I will become an outdoorsy, hiking, biking, green, tree-hugging, granola-eating, Birkenstock-wearing, cloth bag-using, armpit hair-growing health nut. Except for the armpit hair part.

I'll let you know how that works out. But I'm totally still buying razors.

5 comments:

Jen said...

I hope the proximity diet works better then SWEAT YOUR ASS OFF in Az diet.

Fannie said...

It worked for my mother. Seriously, we moved from Connecticut to Denver. She played less bridge and more tennis and she did get skinnier and healthier. I'm just sayin'.

Scotvalkyrie said...

Don't forget the fern-sniffing! I think that's what does the skinny. And the reason behind Mississippi? That's where all the Casino Buffets are.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

If it works I may be right behind you.

Anonymous said...

Woohoo! Still better than Alabama! ;)