Monday, July 14, 2008

Work It, Baby

So, I have this job. I work for a company that does medical software-y stuff. Because the medical profession is a 24/7 operation (haha, operation, get it?), we also, at the computer place, work 24/7. Well, not all of us at once...we work in shifts, of course.

When people ask me what I do, I tell them I work in product support for a medical software company. This is technically true. I am part of the product support team.

However, what I normally don't mention, is that I'm on the bottom rung of the team ladder, so to speak. So what I'm saying is this: Don't even bother with a college degree if you're going to disappear from the workforce for 12 years to raise yer young'ins. Because when all you've been doing in those 12 years is wiping butts and noses, trying to maintain some semblance of order in a losing battle, and doing a whole lot of laundry, that degree won't matter a whit when you go looking for a job. I don't even know what a whit is. That's college for you.

For the past four years, I have been working the swing shift, or for those of you who are not familiar with swinging, the 3pm - 11pm shift. For those of you that are familiar with swinging, the part of town I work in is quite lovely, and this store is right across the street. They have a very large...um...sign.

Moving on.

Where was I? Oh yes, my job. Well, for the lovely state education my parents paid for (zip it, Kirsten, I know what you're thinking), I have this job. I took this job on the swing shift so I could stay home during the day with my smallest (and bossiest) child, while husband worked his 6am - 3pm job. Said small child is starting all-day kindergarten in exactly two weeks, so while fun, swinging would no longer be necessary. I'm not sure I want to give it up, though.

Wow, this post is not going where I intended at all. What I've been trying to say is that my job affords me a certain amount of free time. What I do, is when some hospital-type person calls me and says they have a problem with one of our lovely products, I open a case, or for you help-desk types, a "ticket." If this case is critical, such as this:

"Um yeah, our whole SYSTEM is down, and we've had to resort to paper charting!"

Ok, seriously what did you people do before computers? Oh wait, I know...you charted on paper. See, the problem with technology is that it's like crack, or a cellphone. Once people have it, they don't remember how to function without it. But, I digress.

When this sort of emergency happens, I open a case with all their pertinent information, and beam it off to the correct on-call technical analyst person so our customer can have their "problem" "fixed." I do various other menial things as well, but my main job is opening cases, and hanging up on telemarketers who have somehow recently discovered our many phone numbers. Tell me something... if this is the "final notice" that the factory warranty on my car is about to expire, then why in the name of Chrysler do you keep calling me? Doesn't final mean, like...the last? The end? Kaput? Finito? Done?

Goodness, trying to stay on-topic tonight is proving difficult.

Tonight is a very slow night here at Ye Olde Workplace. When it's slow and I have no fires to put out, I'm allowed to do pretty much whatever I want, including but not limited to, read, surf the Internet, write blog posts, watch DVDs, and stare out the window, wondering if we'll get another monsoon storm tonight (click here for some really great pictures my friend Jen took of the awesome storm we had yesterday). Occasionally I will watch TV too, but at the moment, I don't see much on TV worth wheeling the thing out and plugging it in. TV sucks right now. It's like the writers strike all over again, except they insist on calling it "summer." As proof, I point out that a new season of Big Brother started last night. Which I absolutely refuse to watch, after that hellish Dick/Danielle fiasco where I lost my cookies and a few other things. Oh Lost, and Heroes...I miss you. Please write.

For those of you who are wondering if I'm ever going to get to the point (and I'm sure that's all of you, by now), here it is. I was browsing my blogroll earlier, and came upon a post by Diesel in which he actually deigned to respond to a meme. Normally, he lets Grundir the Implacable dispense with any and all memes sent his way, but this one, asking for tips on writing a funny blog post, he answered. For which I truly thank him. Not because any of his tips helped me, (let's face it, some people can naturally bring the funny, and I don't think I qualify), but because through his meme-answering, I discovered a few new, pee-your-pants type of blogs. So, thank you Diesel...and since I know how much you love big girls, I'm over here waiting for you, naked.

So, now we're to the point, in which I wanted to share some newly discovered funny blogs! I hope these ladies don't mind the extra 4 or 5 readers I might send their way. Oh, who am I kidding, there's no such thing as bad publicity, right? Don't worry, I'll spell your names right.

The Smiling Infidel
Happy Meals and Happy Hour
Roaming Southerner
O Mighty Crisis

Enjoy! I'm going back to "work" now. And by work, I mean I'm going to watch a movie.

10 comments:

alice-bunnie said...

Sounds like when I worked for the answering service. It was great when I was in school and I could study when the phones got quiet. :) Unfortunately (or fortunately), there was no internet then. ;)

Hey, I joined The Grocery Game, so send me your email and I can give you my referral. You can post it as a comment on my blog and then I can delete the comment, then the boogymen won't get your email. Hehe.

Jen said...

Oh, great. 4 more blogs I have to add to my list. Kids, say good bye to Mommy....it's be real and fun.

Anonymous said...

I really wasn't thinking of anything except that when people start mentioning State Institutions I immediately think of the institution on 24th and VanBuren - but it's all the same, right? Hope you are have a grand day!! Those "dog days of summer" are almost to an end and soon enough there will be calls about band t-shirts and lunch money and your child did !WHAT!...(ooops I was thinking of my kid, sorry), ya know what I mean...KLM

pnkzepp said...

Kirsten....Are you suggesting that my wife be committed? I think I will get the girls some band shirts. Rush, Night Ranger, Frankie Goes to Hollywood "RELAX" shirts. I know they are into retro stuff, and the Led Zeppelin, and Rolling Stones, Pink Floyd Shirts are still in fashion. That just reminded me ...I MISS MY OLD RUSH 2112 TOUR SHIRT!!!! Goodness, I'm old.

Shelley said...

Um...I think she was talking about school band t-shirts. You know, like marching band? Tangent, much?

The Roaming Southerner said...

Thanks for the shout out! I am assuming you found me through HappyHour/Meals...and really the word about Bathroom Gangsta must be spread. he is addictive...all the bloggers do go to his yard!

Lish said...

I'm still having a Beavis and Butthead moment...you're a swinger...hehehehehehe. ;)

Mary said...

Thanks for the new blogs to read! I need more to keep me occupied as I find myself sitting on the couch with my feet up more and more and more. I should be doing my college homework, but I don't feel like doing it. My brain wants fun lighthearted entertainment, not postcolonial oppression novels that need analyzing after reading twice.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

At least if you have to have a job you don't like you can blog while doing it--so really, you're getting paid for blogging. That's everybody's dream!

Scotvalkyrie said...

And yet, and yet . . . hardly anyone manages to stay working here. Why is that??? :^)